Welcome to St Alphonso’s Life Point Fundamentally Emerging Fellowship. It’s a busy night at old SALPFEF (pronounced salp-fef), lots of activity… hope you enjoy the tour.
Trustees meeting tonight in multi purpose room. On the agenda tonight:

Which lawn service should we spend the congregations tithing on?
The silk paraments are getting a little dull, maybe it’s time [...]

This is pretty weird stuff… (and it did not come from the Onion). What’s your take?